Thursday, 15 September 2016

Day of Two Halves

Hi everyone 
Well my since my blog post on early hours of Wednesday morning, I have been trying to sleep off all my worries and not very successful but at least in my bed I wasnt having to deal with reality.
Today I got up and got Jayden out to school and saw Ian off to work and then went back to bed after uploading part one of my ballet shoe tutorial.

Set my alarm for 3.20pm to let Jayden in from school and then came back up to my craftroom and started decorating one of the ballet shoes (done the other one later on camera)
about 4.30pm Jayden shouted up "Jordan's back" and I thought yeah okay Jayden, he is going through a very annoying stage of winding everyone up just now.
But seconds later I heard footsteps coming up the stairs turned to see who was coming up and it was Jordan, I almost squashed him to death with a hug honestly I just wanted to keep hold of him forever.
but once I let him go I started with a million questions.
Thankfully his lawyer who had applied for a high court appeal got a last minute slot in the high court this morning at 10am by 10.30am Jordan got a phone call at the prison to say he was being bailed and released his lawyer was just emailing the paperwork through to them. After lunch he got released with a bus pass and his £30 we had took in for him but no change so he couldnt use the phone box so he had no idea how to get home and had to ask lots of people before he got on his way finally, bus from Polmont to Falkirk, then Falkirk to Glasgow, then Glasgow to Beith.
He has had a harsh reality check the prison was 23hr lock down so he was in his cell alone for 23hrs of the day because he is on remand there is no work or training/learning nothing.
So he really struggled but thankfully one of the kids he was brought up with was inside and on his unit, he took him under his wing and made sure he was okay and didnt get any bother.
But he has said it was really hard a lot of time to think and appreciate what he has and going to make sure he holds on to it.
The new bail has no curfew and he is on normal bail so he has more freedom but I have gave him the advice not to be out wandering about after 9ish as the police will just pick him up for breathing the wrong way because he is known to them and is back out.
He has agreed and said he doesnt intend to, and for a first time EVER he has agreed to work voluntary if needed anything to just get him some structure and let the court see when he does reappear that he is making a real effort to turn his life around and no go back down the path he was on. Jordan up until today has always moaned about doing nuffin for nuffin so to hear this today was music to my ears.
He is ringing his support worker in the morning to see if she can arrange some training or work experience for him and what elese she can help him with to keep him out of prison.

For me I feel like I am on cloud 9, I honestly feel like a huge weight is off my shoulders and I can relax and know where he is and that he is okay. and tonight he went round to his friends and came home about 8.30pm and is now sat downstairs on facebook talking to his wee G/F.

Me, Ian and Jordan took Max down the beach tonight for a wee walk (I stayed in the car while the boys walked) it was great I sat and literally sobbed with just pure relief and tiredness all the negative crap just ran out, ian came back and gave me a wee hug knowing I looked upset and I just wish that this feeling would last but thats unrealistic, we then drove to dominos and got Pizza, I got texas bbq on thin italiano pizza the boys got meteor (loads of meat) and we got wedges and twisted doughballs to share. then we drove home, I got a wee jack and coke (diet) and ian and jordan had a wee can of bud each, Jayden got a fruit shoot.
and we ate and drunk while watching eastenders just perfect.

I have had so much support this week you wouldnt believe 
my mum & dad, my wee sister, my soul sister nicky, my brother and my sis in law, my online friends Amanda, Melissa, Fatima, my neighbour Heather & Katie a friend who lives nearby, and my niece Kim, and Wee Laura (her brother was in prison with Jordan so she gave me a lot of good advice and encouraged me he would be fine) and honestly without these people I would literally have crumbled in a heap.

I am one of the first people to offer help when someone is in need and I do what I can to help so I know that is why I got so much support but it is overwhelming really to get it back.

Normal schedule will resume shortly tomorrow we have some appointments for support etc but then we are all done for now.
and I can get back to doing what I love crafting.
Heres a wee sneaky peek at the ballet shoes project so far and some monday cards for my you tube series coming up x 

Enjoy and speak soon
Love and hugs always Karen xx

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